Archive for December, 2009

The year of YOU

December 30, 2009

As we find ourselves upon the final days of 2009, I am finding that a lot of people are reflecting upon the last year.

The other day I found myself on a lunch date with some of my favorite people. DB, BB, and CC, an old friend from high school. DB and BB are a married couple who have proven time and time again to be some of the best friends a girl could ask for. While we played catchup with CC, having not seen her for years, I found myself realizing that my year has been… a circus at best.

As DB commented on how chaotic things had been for me, I realized that while things have been nuts, I have had a solid core of people watching my back. As I look back over the past year, I realize that a number of huge life changes occurred…

In chronological order:

1) New Salon2) Realization (and acceptance) that I don’t want to be a full time hair stylist my whole life.

3) Realizing the importance of avoiding reality TV at any and all cost.

4) New non-profit office job… (actual real adult hours!)

5) The sad habit I picked up of working 70-80 hours a week. (and, as DB pointed out, kindly… living off of coffee, sour patch kids, and a few other not so healthy things…) The realization that this lifestyle… sucks.

6) Learning the art of breaking up with a therapist.

7) Getting MARRIED.

8)Experiencing a honeymoon. Learning that I have a passion for St. Lucia.

9) Adding the greatest canine in the world to my family.

10) Learning and accepting that just because a person gets married, life stays *almost* the same. Also, relationships keep the stressors they had pre-wedding, they just carry more weight with the whole till death thing.

11) My body is not unbreakable. I also learned that surgery is crazy, and having nerves successfully allow for feeling is awesome.

12) Giving up sugar SUCKS, but is worth it.

13) Tragedies occur, and people we love are lost. Old, young, in between… you never know when…

14) I have really good friends.

As the year comes to a close, I have a number of ideas of ways to make this new year, new decade, simpler, to be more focused on appreciating the little things.

Make this the year of YOU. You might be surprised how many people benefit from you focusing on your own needs.

*Thanks DB and BB for just being there, and for showing me the true value and example of friendship.

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As if I didn’t already think I was born in the wrong decade…

December 7, 2009

Sugar and Spice and Everything VICE.

December 6, 2009

Going big is much preferred than going home, in my book.

I am one of those people who, rather than trying something, and taking baby steps, I have a higher rate of success if I dive in, full force, to the extreme. I wish this wasn’t the case, but alas… This is one of the many faulty details that make me who I am.

Over the years, I have been addicted to many things. MANY. I hate to say it, but I have one of those awful “addictive personalities”. Rolling all the way back to my early days in life, I had a passion. A more than serious addiction. It took control of my life, plagued my family, and was something that I am not proud of.

For ten years, TEN, I struggled with this vice. It is not pretty, and like many addictions, affected the way I looked, particularly my teeth.

“My name is Delphine Scarlett, and I am a thumb suck-aholic.”

A common vice among the young, but I was extreme. Afraid of slumber parties (not that I was allowed to go until later in life), camp, and falling asleep in public places, this habit plagued me, but at the same time, was my answer to all of life’s stressors. Every possible remedy failed me, every poisonous, disgusting “fix”, could not keep me from my delicious digit.

Finally, in an act of God, I assume, I went to a camp where I was thrown into a tent with the cool older girls. Why? I have no idea, and this lead to me not having a very solid opportunity to make friends at said camp. It was a decent time, but they were strange and only talked about things I had not experienced, while the rest of the group avoided the tent like the plague, as these ladies were less than nice.

Sleeping on a top bunk for the first few days of camp, I could hide my secret. When we switched to tents, a smaller space, where one could view anyone in slumber land, I started to get nervous. To top it all off, I am queen of falling asleep first, so my deep dark skeleton would be forced out of the closet. The first night, I tossed and turned, felt the tent walls closing in on me, and feared the rest of my time there, knowing that my explosive temper could overwhelm anyone, due to the thumb detox. Somehow, though I found myself okay the next nights, wanting to be normal, and not embarrassing myself in front of these older 12 and 13 year old bitches.

http://www.oneshetwoshe.com/ 2009/10/time-to-take-awa...

This was the end of my first vice. Like I said, an act of a higher power.

muppet.wikia.com/wiki/ Bye-Bye,_Thumb-Sucking

I have had many other addictions. Everything from food, drink, cigarettes, eating, not eating, and changing my hair color, this is something that is a large part of my life. The largest addiction as of late, depending who you ask, is a bad one. It is something that I became aware of suddenly, and makes me concerned not only for my appearance, but my overall health.

beaut.ie/blog/ ?tag=sugar-cravings

I am 100%, whole heartedly,out of control addicted to sugar.

I could eat candy until my face turns blue, until my teeth rot out of my head,until I am overwhelmed with digestive conflict. I love sweet, I love sour, I love fruity flavors, I love chocolate-y goodness. I can live off of any food that falls into the category of “no nutritional value whatsoever”.

http://www.alicia-logic.com/ capsimages/ww_015.jpg

I would, in fact, be the kid who gets stuck in the tube of any kind of candy, in the hopes of just having one more hit.

So, a handful of weeks ago, a light bulb went off in my head. It hit me like a ton of bricks, landing on me, whether I wanted it or not. I started reading up on sugar, reading about the effects of ingesting my perfect drug.

As someone who struggles with skin nonsense (eczema), IBS, and mood swings, I found that all of these things are overwhelmingly affected by sugar. I started looking further and further, drowning myself in information, drowning myself in education about the negative results of my favorite thing in the world.

I made the executive decision. Go big. Don’t go home. Give up sugar. All or nothing.

As I started prepping for it, I found a balance of nerves and excitement. I wanted to start right away, but Man-Friend reminded me that we were very close to Halloween, and that was just begging for failure. So, as of November 1st, 2009, I became sugar free.

I felt less than great by Day 4.

http://www.herenowhealing.com/ truthbeauty/files/0596..

Scratch that, I felt like death. Through days 4-8, I was in detox hell. I was dealing with a pounding migraine, cold sweaty clamminess, extraordinarily blemished skin. I had cold chills, nausea, and my digestive system was less than receptive to food.

But I was doing it.

People kept saying- you can’t go cold turkey. You will fail. You should taper off, and see how it goes.

This never works for me, and the statements of my imminent fail, just motivate me to succeed. I consider it to be my own personal Popeye spinach. The assumption of failure, just pushes me farther.

As I got to the two week point, I became very aware of my addiction. It is easy to joke about being addicted to candy, but going through the honest to goodness detox, opened my eyes. I was addicted, and probably would have found a doctor telling me in the not so far off future that I could no longer have it, which would make it so much worse, not doing it on my own terms.

The holidays are not the perfect time, but my motivation stayed strong.

Today, I am on Day 36 of my sugar-less life. I feel good. I feel like I am finally doing something for me, for my own health, and to remind myself that I have the power to change. Focusing on my overall health,rather than the hope of fad diets fixing my weight and self-esteem, has also made me proud of me.

So…I am still in the midst of this lifestyle change. I am still working to create a better me. I am still avoiding any and all refined sugar and white carbs and all pop.

And for the record, I am still far from perfect. I have no problem admitting that I have thought about dropping bows on anyone sipping a diet coke in my presence, just to steal the tiniest taste.

I have far to go. But so far, no one has been harmed in this experiment. So far.

http://www.squidoo.com/ added-sugar-a-culprit

*DS


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